Sample Extract From Anger Management


Face it, you want to change your anger. Perhaps your wish to change follows some incident where you lost control. Or maybe you’ve struggled for a long time, looking desperately for a way to stop the damage anger does to your relationships and your life. You’ve started reading this book because you no longer want to be trapped in your anger.



The battle with anger has cost you—in energy, of deep and painful regret, and of damage to your closest bonds. You feel that your efforts at anger control and all the ways those efforts have failed, have left a deep impact on you.


You probably already have a good idea how much responding with anger has cost you in the various areas of your life. Have you experienced broken and strained relationships? Sickness and poor health? Excessive stress? Difficulties at school or work? Problems with alcohol and other substances? There may also be other costs that are less obvious, or that you choose not to think about.


The following exercise on calculating the costs of anger can help you to see exactly what anger has cost you in your life. This will also give you a better idea of what you have missed out on by responding to anger feelings with anger behavior.


You may already have an idea that something is wrong. This is a good starting point. The difficult work is facing exactly what is wrong and coming to terms with what anger has cost you.

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